Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Well, That Sucks

Something sucky happened today.
Chun Feng came back, and Shuen Keat spoke considerably less to me today.
But my theory of gloominess has been proven wrong. I remained stuck in another depressed morning, despite the lack of incredibly over-repeated jokes and quotes. What is it that is eating into my happiness?

Could it be schoolwork?
No, I didn't mind the assignments today.

Could it be lack of sleep?
Maybe, but I still was gloomy on Monday morning after resting all Sunday.

Well, I do hope it gets better. I'd like me back.

Ah, I did think of one thing that kind of bummed me earlier today.
Well, Mrs Y lost the cap to her back marker, and somewhere during her lesson it was pointed out by D that she had accidentally made two black marks on Van's back. The back of her shirt.
Needless to say, Van went crazy. The fact that it was Mrs Y that did it made the situation worse, for Van hated Y. After asking for the price of a school shirt from us, she demanded the price from Y. Well, there isn't much in that that bummed me, it was majorly from what happened shortly after.
V and D plotted V's revenge against Y. It kind of sickened me to hear the snickering and laughing in the process of the planning. It reminded me of the evils of teenagerism. The way they sounded so determined in her revenge, how they laughed in anticipation for it to happen, and how satisfied she looked after it did happen.
Seeing Van satisfied does not sicken me, but seeing anybody satisfied from such a cause does.
She'll hate me, probably, for writing this, but I'll leave it to her to explain how what she did was indeed fair. I'm sure she has a reason. I hope it's just.
: (
It was during that period that I had my first sign of sympathy for Y. Something did it.


I'm killing myself with this post.


Just got off the phone with Freddie.
His excuse for not coming tomorrow definitely is something I accept, but I don't know about the rest.
Well, if they're going to boot him, I want him to be some form of outside help. Damnit.


Almost forgot:
I played around a bit with the school piano today. Played it by ear. It kind of sucked as the notes were all blocky and the music had not flow, but it was a shot at playing again.
Sigh is the word of March.

-Zan

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

I Need To Think Up Better Post Titles

I've been theorizing about why my school periods are starting with great, great frustration now, and my theory is that it is because Chun Feng is not coming to school lately. he is sick.
It is not that I miss his company or his habit of sleeping in class, no, nothing like that. But it is because that when he is absent, he leaves a blank space. A blank space in that chair of his.
And this is dangerous.
For the SK has lurked behind that row of seats, waiting for a chance to sit closer to me.
He has taken his chance, and he sits behind me. And damn is it frustrating.
Do you like being pestered, bombarded rather, with jokes and quotes from movies that were released years ago?
Do you like being told the same damn joke over and over?
Do you like this happening to you each morning, marking the start of your very school lessons?
EACH. BLOODY. MORNING?

And that is why I am bitter in mornings. Why I have been that way recently, I mean.

I hate him now.
Because he is changing my style of typing here (very subtle in the change, but I see it: I haven't typing with the rush to do so, recently.)
Because he is making me dull in my morning periods, blocking my will to learn and sucking the soul from my body with each LAME STATEMENT.
Because he approaches me even before class, even when he has nothing to say.

And this is the part where Van comes in to suggest some method of help.
... please?


Anyways, the remainder of this post will consist of little notes and reminders for me to remember what to post about the next time I post.

Brow utility (in class).
Zebra crossings.
How staying late in school happifies me so.


Feeling like shitnuggets:

-Zan

Thursday, March 22, 2007

acegikmoqsuwy -ZED-

I guess this kind of explains itself. Got the link from this guy's blog.
Should I trust the results? Should you?
Should I wait until after I finish my misanthropic/melancholic/stress-filled little period of no-sleepness to take the test once more?

Advanced Global Personality Test Results
Extraversion |||||||||| 40%
Stability |||||||||||||||||| 80%
Orderliness |||||||||| 33%
Accommodation |||||||||||| 43%
Interdependence |||||||||||||||| 70%
Intellectual |||||||||||||||| 70%
Mystical |||||||||||||||| 63%
Artistic |||||||||||||||||||| 83%
Religious |||| 16%
Hedonism |||| 16%
Materialism |||||||||||| 43%
Narcissism |||||| 30%
Adventurousness |||||||||||| 43%
Work ethic |||||||||||||||| 63%
Self absorbed |||||||||||| 43%
Conflict seeking |||||| 30%
Need to dominate |||||||||||| 43%
Romantic |||| 16%
Avoidant |||||||||||||| 56%
Anti-authority |||||||||||||||| 63%
Wealth |||| 16%
Dependency |||||||||||| 43%
Change averse |||||||||||| 50%
Cautiousness |||||||||||||| 56%
Individuality |||||||||||| 50%
Sexuality |||||||||||| 43%
Peter pan complex |||||||||||| 50%
Physical security |||||||||||||||||||| 90%
Physical Fitness |||||||||||||| 57%
Histrionic |||| 16%
Paranoia |||||||||||| 43%
Vanity |||||||||||| 50%
Hypersensitivity |||||||||| 36%
Female cliche |||| 16%

Stability results were high which suggests you are very relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic..

Orderliness results were moderately low which suggests you are, at times, overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment.

Extraversion results were moderately low which suggests you are reclusive, quiet, unassertive, and secretive.

trait snapshot:
secretive, reclusive, messy, disorganized, introverted, unassertive, rarely worries, dislikes large parties, does not like to fit in, does not need to control others, solitary, ambivalent about chaos, tough, leisurely, does not respect authority, not aggressive, observer, abstract, impractical, dislikes leadership, daydreamer, bizarre, does not make friends easily, not a perfectionist, suspicious, rarely irritated, strong physical instincts, unsympathetic at times, risk taker, submissive, weird, sarcastic, strange

-70% not Zan
-20% Zan's uncommon, current bitterness.

10%:

-Zan

YOU.

For some reason I hate everyone now.
I don't like it.

I can't think of a person right now that I can't mentally snarl at. This might have something to do with me sleeping way too late staying up doing work for the past three days. Or.. nights. Or mornings.

I guess not sleeping does induce crankiness.
Oh, and I have finally started to hate "Mrs Ow".

..
Like, REALLY hate.
More than before, that is.

This post sucks. I have work to do here. Ararswsrfewf

-Zan

Sunday, March 18, 2007

About Time.

I was thinking about things that I would do/start doing when I become old enough to live alone. Here is the list:

1: Become a lousy vegetarian who sneaks fish into meals.

2: Have my normal haircut be a bald head for at least a year.

3: Have foot-length hair as a norm for at least 6 months.

4: Have a room purely for artistic expression.

5: have a room filled with bubble-pool balls.

And that's all I can think of so far.
NEXT:

More habits shown by other people in public that I hate:
People who stop in front of the escalator to look around with a mock "wtf?" expression, telling the world that they accidentally took the wrong escalator.
..
GET OUT OF THE WAY.
It sucks to be the person behind escalator-cloggers, because people will blame you for being the one causing all the stumbling.
Rr.

I remember seeing a class of students in City Hall, being briefed on how they would be collecting donations. No, not the put-the-coin-in-the-can kind of collecting, but the kind where they show you their papers and ask for the donation. It usually is a Jaws-type of situation.

You are walking towards the inside of the MRT station.
You look around for a garbage bin to throw your can of (some carbonated drink) .
As your eyes sweep around the area, they unknowingly chance upon the looming eyes of another.
In a fraction of a millisecond, those eyes somehow notice that you have looked at them. They look back, and the bearer of those eyes perks up.
Immediately he dashes towards you, holding out his card and papers, speaking with such bullet-like speed.
The following occurs:

*shows you identification card*
"HelloI'mBillyKohFromBlaBlaBlaOrganisation.."
"Uh, I-"
"AsYouCanSeeFromMyCardIAmNotAFakeTryingToCheatYouOfYourMoney"
"but I di-"
"WeArePartOfANon-ProfitBlaThatHelpsBlahsToBla. IfYouWouldJustBeSoKindTo
-"
"Shit. Well all I have now is two dollars. Is that okay?"

he gives you some stupid crinkly look with the eyes.
THE EYES.
As if to say "SHOW ME YOUR WALLET, I KNOW YOU HAVE MORE!"
THE EYES KNOW YOU LIE.

And it's all so unnerving and embarrassing and Blegh.
Still, luckily for me the kids were being briefed, and their doom was not unleashed to the public before I hop-jogged my way past them.
Zan 1, Those Students 0.

I really gotta get blogging again. This all looks... sloppy.
I NEED TO GET MY FLOW BACK.
Hm.
Ah, right, the old people.

I hate walking past old people. Even worse, old-people posses.
It's just the fact that I feel so much like an ASSHOLE when they walk slowly.... slowly... sooo slowly in front of me, and when I walk normally past them i look like I'm deliberately trying to show off my superior walking skills. And I'm not! I even slow down a bit, I try my best, but nothing refrains from making you look like a dick when you walk past old people.
Tip: Pretend you're really late for something and just rush past. It should save you the guilt.

Ssssiggggh.
Sigh 1: This evening is the last evening of the holidays.
Sigh 2: Unexpected feelings and wtf-ness arise.
ANYWAYS.
I do have one more thing to blog about (how to cheat the zebra-crossings.), but that'll be for next time. Now, I REALLY NEED TO DO MY WORK.

PS: You'll never guess what Sigh 2 is about.
(Not Van, in case anybody was wondering.)

-Zan